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Basic Principles of Good Communication With All Kinds of Animals

MAGDALEN ECKOFF

The author describes techniques of communicating more effectively with animals. They include the use of unconditional love, sharing life time, noticing their individual vocal and behavioral language, learning species-specific needs and signals.

KEY WORD INDEX:: animal behavior, psychological needs, animal welfare, behavior patterns, animals

About the Author

INTRODUCTION

My husband and I live in Angel Canyon, Utah. We share our home with a community of about 60 rescued dogs, cats, and birds -- and Mollie the Pot-Bellied Pig, who is one of the spokes-creatures for Best Friends Animal Sanctuary, where we work.

My husband and I agree words could never express the love we feel for the animals we live with! I also find they constantly teach us their languages and their ways. In our large animal family, there is a great variety of tail wagging, tail dipping, fur and feather fluffing, and body posturing with which they communicate their opinions and needs. In case any of us miss the point, there is an equally great variety of barking, howling, yipping, meowing, hissing, purring, caterwauling, squealing, chirping, and squawking that makes things perfectly clear!

After nearly five decades of living and working with animals of all kinds, I have come to marvel at the incredible variety of physical communication tools both human and non-human animals have at hand. I also know beyond these tools is another level on which the great bulk of communication, the communication that really counts, occurs. This is also the level on which we share the greatest gift which comes from living and working with animals: unconditional love.

Good communication between people and animals is based on being open to the energy and dynamism of the love which flows easily between us. When that is allowed, all the other basics follow automatically.

LOVE AS THE BASIC DYNAMIC

People who have a close emotional bond with one another - spouses, twins, parents and their children - often describe a kind of "sixth sense," an unspoken communication that occurs between them, telling them of each other's needs or circumstances. This is the same basic and enduring level of communication which can occur between people and the animals in their lives. I describe the essential element which makes this silent communication possible as the energy born out of a relationship based on unconditional love.

Love is many things, but basically it is a deep and abiding care and concern, a willing of good, a wanting to know about and a wanting the best for another. It is accepting and being happy with the individual, just the way they are. Unconditional love is the same, with no expectations or demands of any kind in return for these feelings.

Non-human creatures are not defensive about who they are; they do not have great demands on themselves to be other than who they are. They usually do not worry about their future, nor do they regret their past. They live fully in the present, aware of and interacting with whatever is around them.

When we humans share our lives with them, we are able to connect with that same non-defensive place within ourselves. In a normal person/pet(s) relationship there is no fear, just love, unconditional love. This is why people like to have animals in their lives: the love. The relaxation, tranquility, and pure child-like enjoyment that follows is a very healing thing. This is the reason animals are part of programs visiting the elderly or sick. Scientists have shown that blood pressure drops when a person pets an animal; studies have also shown heart-attack victims with pets are less likely to suffer a second attack. From my own unscientific studies of hundreds of animals and their people, I say love heals, both the human and the pet!

An experience which illustrates this involves a totally feral mother cat who was brought to Best Friends with her several two-week old kittens. She was so frightened she clung to the top of a curtain rod in the little room where she had been put with her babies. She would not come down though the kittens were hungry and crying for her. Finally, I went in and with calming sounds, slow movements, and words of love, I clambered awkwardly up to her, conscious of almost taking the actual substance of love and sending it to her with everything I did. After what seemed like forever as I balanced on unstable boxes, she allowed me to lift her gently off the rod and into my arms. Cooing and purring while she growled and grimaced, I brought her down to her babies and rocked her for a while telling her how much they needed her. She relaxed, she let all her fear go, and jumped into their box to feed them. She is now part of my own large community of cats -- and is, of course the one who always has to be in my arms whenever I'm around!

Working with animals is also a healing process for those who care for them. One young girl in particular stands out for me. She was about 14 and arrived to volunteer at Best Friends with her father. She wore a woolen cap pulled down on her face and heavy clothing in mid-July. She was clearly hiding, and did not respond to anyone. According to her father she insisted on coming here for the week he had promised to spend with her. The animals she worked with made it clear why she wanted to be here -- she absolutely loved them! She was in her element and she worked extremely well. As the week went on, her cap came off, her clothes lightened up, as did her entire bearing and demeanor.

Love; the first and most important principle in communication. It flows from us to the animals and from the animals to us. With this energy in place, we know communication is in place. It may just need a little fine-tuning!

LISTENING AS A DYNAMIC

When listening to an animal, we can't do it with half our attention. We need to use all our senses because animals communicate with all of their senses and faculties. We do not necessarily need to use our rational brain, but rather "get the feel" of what he or she may be trying to tell us.

I have worked with hundreds of rescued cats, dogs, and birds, and have found the best way to listen is to simply sit with the individual and remain quiet, open, and receptive. Why did her behavior change? Why is he lethargic? Why does she refuse food? Why did he stop using the litter tray? Does she want to be placed with others at this time, or left alone for a while? Hold, cuddle, stroke (when possible), ask the question aloud, think of nothing else but the question at hand ... the answer often just pops right into our heads. It comes from this communion you and the other animal have established. The more we do this, the more accurately we can "get" the answer.

One winter after a storm, someone brought me a fairly large bird with a very long, pointy beak, in a box. They thought he was injured. I didn't recognize the bird, and did not want to take him out of the box and to risk his flapping around hurting himself further -- and there was the matter of the long pointy beak. I contemplated the bird and the situation, and kept "getting" that he needed to be on or near water. When I tried to look at him more closely, a strong sense of vitality communicated through his loud scolding made me feel he was not injured badly, if at all, so I took him to a little lake nearby. There I let him out of the box, and he waddled away on the largest webbed feet I'd ever seen! Later, a little research told me he was a grebe - and grebes are often knocked out of the sky during storms. They can take off only from water; those huge feet prevent them moving on land with any speed or grace. This grebe stayed on the little lake for about ten days, and then continued his migration. When I visit there I can still feel his presence, and his thanks to me for listening and believing what he told me about his need to be on water.

LEARN THE LANGUAGE

Often, when people bring a new animal into their home, they first try to control them, for example to get them to understand commands or to learn new routines or tricks. This represents trying to impose our ways and our language on someone who already has their own perfectly adequate ways and language. It is far more productive to listen to our creatures, and learn how they speak -- to get to know who they are. This makes it easier for them to want to get to know our language, and who we are.

The "words" an animal uses to speak with us involve all kinds of body language as well as sounds, looks, behavior, and impressions. If we are comfortable listening to the creatures as described above, learning their unique languages follows naturally.

Each species has its own set of signs. A cat whipping the tail back and forth is irritated; a dog doing the same is expressing a desire to play, or just that he is happy; a pot-bellied pig doing the same is investigating things; a fish doing the same is swimming! Also, I find each species has his or her own place from which to communicate. For instance, dogs and cats seem to center their contact in the heart. They are very intelligent, but they deeply need to know what their person is feeling. Birds are very sound-oriented, and want to converse at length about important issues. Pot-bellied pigs, oddly enough, are very like the birds. I find Mollie always fully involved in her head, she wants me to engage her intellect and challenge her wit.

Each individual within a species also has his or her own set of signs and ways of expressing. A colleague of mine has several cats, and although to an outsider all their meows may sound the same, he is aware that each meow from each cat is completely different, requiring a completely different response. One is telling him to fill the water bowl, another is saying it's time to play, another is saying it's treat time.

Our furred and feathered friends are very aware of the time and care we put into listening to them and learning their languages. Their response will eventually be a reciprocation of the same, as they learn and respond to our languages. I have a parrot I rescued from a pet store. Scared and silent for many months, he startled me one day by telling a dog, by name, to get off the bed! The once-frightened little mama cat I mentioned earlier now knows exactly when I'm feeling a little low, and gives me a big hug. People with animals in their lives tell of many similar examples of these wonderful "golden moments," when it is clear the bond of love between them and their pets has reached new depths of expression: the reward of listening and learning our friend's unique language.

FIND SELF-CONFIDENCE

Animals sometimes seem to respond perversely to a lack of confidence. It often happens that if the aunt who's afraid of cats comes calling, the cat is going to land in her lap. If the friend who finds animals a bit intrusive comes by one day, all four-legged ones arrive jumping, yapping, drooling, and doing other "rude" things!

Pets test our resolve, especially if they are new in a home, or if they are puppies and kittens growing up and trying to find out what their boundaries are, both physically and in the arena of their behavior and areas of control. If we want to be "in charge" in the home, then we'd better show we can be, or they will feel, quite rightly, that they can do a better job!

I had a frantic call for help from a couple once who had brought a beautiful red Doberman puppy into their home. These are creatures who really want a sense of stability and security in their environment. My own red dobie will not leave my heels if she senses that anything is changing in our lives -- she often picks up on change before I do. For this young couple everything was fine until their Doberman became about eight months old. He then decided their bed, on which he had been allowed to sleep, was now his, and he didn't particularly want to share it with them anymore. They were afraid of getting him off because he would growl at them, and the relationship began to deteriorate.

I recommended this young couple not shut the dog out of their bedroom, and then slowly out of their lives. Instead, one of them should get on the bed first, and when the dog came in and started toward the bed, they should gently growl at him. I also suggested that the dog be given his own bed right next to theirs, which they would agree never to sleep on! It all worked out fine, and the three of them are back to happily sharing all parts of their home and their lives.

ROUTINES COMMUNICATE SECURITY

Family pets, animals in the wild, the large numbers of animals in sanctuaries such as Best Friends -- and human animals -- are all creatures of habit, responding well to the gentle discipline of a "framework" of routine. When mealtime, walk time, play time, and/or lights out time are always the same, and when certain behaviors are never allowed, and certain behaviors are always allowed, the pet is living in an atmosphere which communicates safety, stability, and security. This tells the creature that our care and concern are solid and enduring. Within the nurturing security of such a framework the pet's own personality can develop in a healthy and rewarding manner.

When a pet is feeling secure, it then becomes equally important to pay attention to the routines and jobs he or she will begin working out for her/himself. I have about thirty cats in my home, and one of them knows exactly when the automatic watering in the garden comes on and has to be there to play with it. Others monitor when and where dinner must happen, or help the bath water come out of the faucet, or clean up the dog food bowls, or check up on the birds, or help with the sweeping. They all keep very busy and it's my job not interfere with their personal routines!

Mollie the pot-bellied pig will let everyone within miles know if I'm late with her dinner. Ducky, my handicapped miniature dachshund has given herself the job of escorting the pig in and out of her enclosures. If I fail to let her do this I am ignored for the rest of the day.

Although it is helpful to allow the creatures their own routines and jobs, in a stable overall routine, it is also good to make a few happy surprises happen, to keep life from getting utterly boring ... then the pets also feel free to let their person enjoy some of their little surprises -- a new game, a new toy, or just a new way to show their love.

THE IMPORTANCE OF INTUITIONS

One of the dictionary definitions of intuition is "direct perception of truth independent of any reasoning process."

In animal care, on any level, openness to our intuitions is essential -- non-human animals do not speak to us with words, but rather with impressions, and their calls for help can often be heard only with the inner ears and senses, where intuition lives. Different people will "intuit" in different ways. Asking animal care workers how they sense things from animals will elicit testimonies about hearing words, seeing pictures, getting sudden thoughts, or feeling sensations in their bodies. The importance is not in how we receive our intuitions, it is paying attention to them!

I received a letter recently from a lady who had gone camping with her family and two dogs. The timid dog disappeared in the night and she spent the next two days frantically searching for her with no luck. After returning home she was despaired and restless. She could not block out the impressions she was getting of exactly where to find the little lost dog, so she bundled the other dog in the car and drove the few hundred miles back to the camping spot. Sure enough, when she relaxed a bit and let herself tune into her intuitions she was able to find the lost little dog with ease.

THE REWARDS OF COMMUNICATION
AND MUTUAL CARING

About a year ago, a very nice man came to volunteer some time at Best Friends. He loved his own dog, but wanted to know what working with a huge number would be like. Although he had once conducted a symphony orchestra, and is now a university professor (he didn't tell us of his distinguished accomplishments for a long time), he just wanted to be one of the fellows cleaning the dog runs. He did that and more, and has been coming regularly ever since. His description of his experience told of a total change within himself -- the discovery of a deep emotional being, a stupendous sensitivity and great up-welling of love. He says these things work throughout his life now, as he relates to people as well animals. He found in himself whole new vistas which far overshadowed all else he had accomplished in his life.

I went through a serious trauma several years ago when my eldest son was killed. My friends, family, and colleagues were all there for me with comfort, love, and consolation, which was deeply appreciated. But the most healing comfort for me came when I went with my grief into the rooms where my assorted animals live. Timid cats would forget their timidity and swirl around my ankles; the dogs came and put their heads in my lap or leaned against me, making soft sounds in their throats, while multitudes of purring kitties would hug me and wash my face and hands. The birds came to the front of their aviary and made little cooing and clucking sounds, fluffing their feathers and talking to themselves. Just as I had not wanted them to live with pain in their lives, they wanted to heal the pain in mine -- and they did.

Magdalen Eckhoff

Resident Animal Communications Expert
Best Friends Animal Sanctuary
Kanab, Utah

Magdalen Eckhoff can't remember a time when animals were not a major part of her life. She has always been particularly fascinated with the high level of spiritual and emotional communication between people and their pets, and with the healing energy that flows between them.

After she left college in the mid-sixties, Magdalen lived in England and Europe, where she pursued studies of religion,
ancient healing arts, mysticism, and the
mythology of animals. Returning to the
U.S. in the early 70's, she began privately rescuing animals and working with people through counselling, workshops, and
lectures to help them develop closer
communication and contact with their pets, and animals in general.

In 1980, Magdalen and several friends began a small, private, no-kill shelter in Arizona. They rescued animals from the pounds and streets of Prescott and Phoenix and began to realize they needed more space to achieve their fondest dreams: a large no-kill sanctuary for companion animals which could be an example of what is possible in this field. In 1984, they acquired Angel Canyon in Southern Utah, which is now home to Best Friends Animal Sanctuary. The sanctuary finds homes for 75% of the animals taken in, and there are never less than 1500 resident animals.

Magdalen works at the sanctuary and is the resident animal communications expert. She also owns and runs a small business in herbal products called Angelscent, and is currently working on a book about communication with animals. She lives in Angel Canyon with her husband, Paul, the architect for Best Friends, and their own large community of 60 rescued dogs, cats, birds, and Mollie, the Pot-Bellied Pig.

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